By: Lata Lakshminarayanan

Child Counsellor

Child behavior management is a subject that can be confusing for many parents and teachers. Most parents don’t want to punish or humiliate their children, but they’re not sure what to do to help them behave properly.

Here are some tips which are practical to assist and provide support to parents and teachers in behavior management.



Clarity is the essence of child behavior management which means the rules must be few, simple and clear. Always be objective and understanding – do not lose your patience even though you are tempted to.

For instance, “We do not hit others”. When your child disobeys a rule, be gentle, but firmly repeat the rule “We do not hit others” and give a reminder about the reason why. Rule with reason and your child will act with integrity and strength.



Communicate your expectations with a minimal number of rules and routines to be followed. Think big, start small.

Involve the child when you are establishing rules and routines. Ask for his/her assistance. Make sure they repeat them – this will help them remember.



Like adults, children have mood swings and may have periods when they’re feeling down. If she has feelings mad or sad, help her learn how to express and release those feelings.

Make sure your child has the essential for good behavior: healthy food, plenty of sleep and a secure relationship with you.



Promote self-esteem and confidence every chance you can. Catch your child doing something great and praise him/her.

Emphasize the child’s strengths and minimize the weaknesses. Set your child up to be successful when the opportunity presents itself.



Provide opportunities for the child to become responsible. When they take responsibility well, let him/her know.



Patience, patience, patience! Even though you may be very frustrated, never lose your patience. Take time to discuss appropriate and inappropriate behaviors. Avoid power struggles – nobody wins in family fights!


A consistent approach when dealing with children with behavioural concerns most often leads to more productive and positive behaviors.

Good luck!